Over at Mahmood's Den, Merlin sarcastically asks me:

silly”bahraini”girl, hows the Canadian citizenship thing going? Nearly there?

While usually cool-headed, that sneaky comment made my blood boil - for to tell you the truth, it really hurt. It hurt because it's my third year here and the thought never crossed my mind. It hurt because I have never quite settled down here and my entire life, existence, friends and interactions rotate around Bahrain and everything Bahraini. It hurts because I see my transition here as temporary. It hurts because I felt I was being singled out as a traitor. And it hurts most because it really is a common sense to seek some form of protection - especially for something like me, who with one wrong slip of the keyboard could find myself "behind the sun."

Merlin,
I am a Bahraini. A Bahraini. And a Bahraini. Bahrain is my country, identity and soul. And you can hit as much as you want under the belt and think what you want to think, but I am as Bahraini as every other decent Bahraini - if not more.

My stay here is not for a citizenship or a passport. I have unique circumstances which I don't think you would understand. I have a country and a family and a home. I have friends and roots in Bahrain. I am a Bahraini. I don't need an Exit Plan B or a Plan C. My destiny is in Bahrain. I was born there and insist on being buried there and won't have it any other way.

I am a Bahraini - Merlin - born to Bahraini parents. I have a very Bahraini family. I lived all my life in Bahrain. I live Bahrain. I dream Bahrain.

If it is any consolation to you, I feel HOMESICK every single day. If it means anything to you I CRY my eyes out missing my home, and country, and family and friends every minute. I am here, but my heart is there. I am in Canada, but my soul is back home.

These are emotions and feelings you won't understand. A Bahraini never leaves his country by choice. A Bahraini is a Bahraini is a Bahraini wherever he goes.

And if ever I am in a situation where I will have to give up my nationality or if I was ever stripped of my nationality by force - I will still be a Bahraini and a proud one too.

3 comments:

Qwaider قويدر said...

It's absolutely no body's business to ask such stuff! You would assume that people who live in "developed" countries know this by now, but someone will come along and surprise you with how stupid and rude they are!

Yu go girl!

SillyBahrainiGirl said...

Thanks Qwaider :) It doesn't really matter what other people think - for what's in the heart is in the heart! In retrospect, I feel I over reacted and should have left the fool thinking!

BuJassem said...

nice blog!

i get the same thing in the UK..

when someone asks about how the passport app is going.. i just say it's ok, but thanks for asking...

or guess what.. i saw your dad in the queue at the passport office... etc :)

just do not allow yourself to be angry.. just stay silly :P

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