Roba has had a pair of beloved sneakers for a little over 10 years. It is indeed a lovely sensation to hang on to anything for that long. The idea warmed me up, me, someone who has conditioned herself not to get attached to anything. I don't know - but as silly as it may be - I don't have a favourite pair of shoes, or bag, or jeans, or even a pullover or a jacket, or a suit, or a dress or a hair clip.

And while it is sad - it all goes back to growing up with five sisters under one roof. Do you think if you are the eldest and you have five other sisters in the same house - anything at all would be yours for too long?

Friends who know me know that I am a shopaholic at heart -- and not one of those moody shoppers. I no longer shop when I am anxious and depressed. That was so last year. I now only shop when I am happy and feel like emitting and receiving good vibes. Anyway back to the sisters, whom I miss more and more everyday. Whenever I would go shopping, I would return home with the resignation that whatever my haul was for the day could be confiscated - if not immediately, then in the very near future.

As such, material goods just became that - disposables. I used to have favourite things but when those favourite things got into other people's (read sisters) hands, I learned to control the urge to throw a fit and be the elder wiser one - until the idea that having anything last until the next season became reality.

And as such, my door was never locked and my purchases includes a lot of extras, especially when it came to my annual pilgrimages - or shopping trips abroad -- where I realised that if I wanted anything to stay with me - and for me alone - I had to buy it in bulk -- and give each of the brood her own.

Of course, the six of us come in different shapes and even colours - with one common denominator - four of us wear the same size shoes! And they sure don't go after my sneakers as I sure do have some tucked away which could be two decades old -- those are completely ignored, no matter what make they are. They have all six eyes fixed on my stilettos - and the more expensive, the better.

And thus I learned not to hang on to anything ... anything at all ... and the only thing I can claim to have held on to for close to a decade is this guy I share an apartment with - who I am married to and who wants to take me shopping today. For what? More disposables?


Roba said...

Haha, I guess that makes us opposites. I never throw ANYTHING. Even stuff I never wear... I'm instantly emotionally attached to anything I own! It's rather harrowing.

Fatema Abuidrees said...

hehe, i actually felt uncomfortable reading this. Having an OCD with things, i find it hard to comprehend throwing away anything!!!

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