You are in Canada. Your home phone - the one which shows the user ID - rings. You look at it. It is a Bahrain number you don't recognise. Your heart pounds. You are excited. You answer the phone. You say hello.. you say hello again.. you say hello a third time.. a fourth time.. Helloo.. hello... anyone there?

The prostitute hangs up.

You wreck your brain thinking.. Who could it be? Who would be calling me? What has happened? Is everything back home Ok? Is my family doing fine? Are all my friends well?

You pick up the phone and call the number back. A prostitute answers and says hello. Now I could have played the same game with the prostitute, whose vagina is wide enough for a truck to make a U-turn in, and kept quiet and then hang up but out of decency I spoke to her.

"You just called me on my Canadian number. Is there anything I can do for you?" I ask.
Silence...

"I don't know who you are. I didn't call you.. erm .. we called a number .. it wasn't you we wanted.. I was calling my relative. It's a girl...Not you I wanted... "

Fine.. bitch.. I will give you the benefit of the doubt .. but what is the likelihood that a Bahraini prostitute would call a wrong number and it would be of another Bahraini in Canada?

I have her number in case you are interested in calling her .. but please keep your business away from me .. for I am no pimp!

PS: AND there is no doubt that you weren't calling for me .. on my number .. at my home.. because I refuse, in principle, to associate myself with STUPID people.

11 comments:

Qwaider قويدر said...

Your excessively allergic reaction means that there's more than meet the eye in this post.
What is going through your head now?
Do you think she's someone you know? Do you think she knows someone else that shares your number? Is that why you're so aggressive?

It could be many things, there might be a perfectly good explanation. And she freaked out. In fact, she might have wanted to call the number right before yours, and you know her very well, and she ended up calling you. By honest mistake ..

I like your graphical images though. Do you think this lady would be around for birthday parties?

(LOL ... Imagine reading your post in Arabic)

SillyBahrainiGirl said...

Qwaider,
I swear I have no idea who this woman is .. but her reaction really annoyed me.

It is only me and my husband in this house and the likelihood of a wrong number is totally out of question. What is the probability of a Bahraini calling the wrong number in Canada? A lot. People make genuine mistakes. But what is the probability of the wrong number she was calling belonging to another Bahraini??

Also, you call someone and it is genuinely a wrong number. You keep quiet and you hang up?

You should at least say sorry ..

bla bla bla

And as for writing in Arabic .. I have thought and joked about it a lot .. but the humour could be lost .. and it could open more doors than I can handle .. especially when truck drivers start emailing me wanting that woman's phone number!

SillyBahrainiGirl said...

oops...and did I mention that I am ready to hand in her number to anyone who asks for it?

Qwaider قويدر said...

7araaam .. :)
khalli albek Abyad :)

Joeprah said...

Yikes...why was she randomly calling you? Weird! Very unsettling if I were in your shoes...I would also be like back the F up on her though.

7aki Fadi said...

How did you know she was a prostitute? Am I missing something?

Rara Avis said...

I think she's got the hots for you but feels timid to confess, especially after watching the attractive face behind the SBG pseudonym. hahahah and then she bagged you "got ur number" and it snowballed to this awkward incidence

have you thought of that possibility?

June said...

There's always an explanation. There must be...

Evil Odd said...

SBG - In my first year at Uni, my phone rang at around 4:00am.

"Hello?"
"Hello?"
"Who is this?"
"Who are you?"
"Odd"
"Odd? Who wants him?" She was talking as if there was someone in her house by the name of Odd.
"No. I mean my name is Odd"
"This is weird"
"It is indeed"
...and the line got disconnected.


The weirdest thing was - I was living in a 300-room residential college all of which had the same first 5 digits - AND

She was speaking Arabic. I was the only Arabic speaker in the college at the time.

Spooky ey?

Adnan said...

"i want 2 live in canada :..("
quite non related but a thought in my heart i had to release!

SillyBahrainiGirl said...

LOL!
Thanks for the comments.

I will explain why I think this woman is a prostitute in a follow up post. Don't want to ruin Eid, etc!

And Adnan .. Canada is cool.. oops.. I mean COLD !

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